In the helping profession or as a woman entrepreneur it is easy to get overwhelmed and start feeling a little burned out. The trick is to recognize the warning signs and do something before you get to the point of quitting. These are also signs you can look for in your team to prevent their burnout as well. Self-care is the best way to prevent burn out.
Symptoms of Burnout that Point to the Need for Self-Care
PERFORMING BELOW YOUR NORMAL STANDARDS —
We all have days when things aren’t as perfect as we want them to be. However, a significant or lasting slip in your normal standards can be a clear warning sign you are worn out and need to schedule some down time.
INCREASE IN NUMBER OF SICK DAYS, ABSENCES OR TARDINESS —
This can be a subtle increase over time or come suddenly after a big event. Pay attention to the number of days you aren’t feeling well and how they correspond to things happening in your work. This can also be a passive-aggressive way to show dissatisfaction and fatigue.
CHANGES IN ATTITUDE TOWARD THE NEGATIVE OR CYNICAL —
If you find your positive attitude tougher and tougher to maintain, it might be time to consider a time-out to refresh and rest.
CHANGES IN PROFESSIONAL BOUNDARIES —
If you notice inappropriate professional boundaries in yourself or your colleagues, it can be a sign self-care is needed. Boundaries tend to be less important when you are tired and just want to get something done.
SIMPLY STATING YOU FEEL “BURNED OUT” —
While it may seem obvious, don’t ignore the things you or your team are saying. If you are saying you feel burned out, overwhelmed, stressed out or exhausted, it is a clear warning sign that you need some time to refresh and get re-energized.
What to Do with These Symptoms and the Need for Self-Care
Give yourself (or your team) a place to talk about how you feel, why you feel that way, and a self-care plan so you can get back on track with your purpose and vision.
Enlist some accountability for yourself as you follow through on your self-care plan.
Address the issue regarding poor performance due to lack of self-care (i.e. professional standards, boundaries and attendance)
Find a self-care partner – someone you can buddy up with to make sure you both take care of yourselves and stay on track in your businesses and lives.
BE still and pray. Prayer is the most basic and effective self-care practice available.
Remember – True rest and peace come from God!
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:26-30)
Need More Help with the Need for Self-Care and Burnout?
About Karen Lindwall-BourgKaren Lindwall-Bourg is the President of the {Inter} National Association of Christian Women Entrepreneurs [est. May 2010] and the new President of the International Christian Mompreneur Network [est. July 2010], both at http://nacwe.org . She and the NACWE Operations and Leadership Teams work diligently to provide
· Community
· Networking
· Education
· Missions
opportunities to Christian Women Entrepreneurs, Mompreneurs and Nanapreneurs alike all over the world!
Our Core Values are
· Community – we value Connection, Collaboration and Contribution
· Networking – we value Nurture, New relationships and New and innovative offers
· Education – we value Encouragement, Excellence and Expressiveness, and
· Missions – we value Ministry and Making a difference
Karen is wife to Fred, Mommy to 6 kids and 5 in-loves, Nana to “going-on” 12 grandchildren, and treat provider deluxe for a herd of Great Pyrenees who protect their north TX ranch! She is an entrepreneur coach, author, publisher, retreat hostess and more! Learn more about Mastermind groups and “Celebration” coaching with Karen at http://karenbourg.com.
Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15
What Type of Decision Maker are You?
As entrepreneurs, we must make decisions not only with our business but also with our family and personal life. Often these three things overlap when you are an entrepreneur. Learning more about our decision making style can often help us develop a strategy that meets our individual needs.
According to academic research, there are four basic types of decision making styles: directive, analytic, conceptual, and behavioral. Each style of decision making can be tailored to a specific role or situation.
DIRECTIVE DECISION MAKING FOR THE ENTREPRENEUR
Directive style decision makers remind me of an officer in the Army. Usually, this style uses only the information available to the decision maker. The leader expects the decision to be followed through and assumes acceptable results. This style doesn’t ask for or consider the opinions of subordinates. She expects compliance without question. This style focuses on short-term results and not long term solutions. The decision is usually made quickly and without the collection of extensive information and facts.
This style of decision making definitely has its place. Especially if you are a leader within a strict chain of command. However, due to the short-term implications of directive decision making, this style shouldn’t be used with problems that need a long term or systemic solution.
The impact on team building is both negative and positive. Our team members may feel unheard and disregarded because decisions come down like orders. On the other hand, when a decision produces a successful result the leader has the opportunity to encourage and congratulate the team for a job well done.
ANALYTIC DECISION MAKING FOR THE ENTREPRENEUR
An analytic decision maker desires information. He researches the problem and solutions from every possible angle. Considerations are analyzed from the smallest implication to the largest impact. It’s all about the data. Usually, this style allows for making decisions on complicated or fluid problems because more data is allowed to be gathered.
While this is a thorough way of making decisions and usually covers a lot of solutions, it is time consuming. Analytic style decision making is not for a fast moving environment. It can prove priceless for setting up systems and operating procedure in our business.
In consideration of the impact on our team members, analytic decision making can give our team the opportunity to provide us with the input, data and research needed for the most effective decision. However, due to the length of the process, teams may become anxious while waiting for a decision to be made.
CONCEPTUAL DECISION MAKING FOR THE ENTREPRENEUR
The conceptual decision maker is the outside the box problem solver. She takes an artistic approach to making decisions. She looks at the problem from every angle, then upside down under a black light while eating ice cream! Usually, this decision maker is goal and achievement oriented. They use their gift for abstract and creative thinking to consider future impact and outcomes on their business.
Because of the broad-view of solutions, this decision maker can be a risk taker. This has both positive and negative implications. It can also be difficult to communicate with a conceptual decision maker due to the extent of abstract thinking.
Creative teams will be on board with this style of decision making. Due to big picture thinking, it can inspire and motivate our team. However, we must be careful to consider the less abstract members of the team who may be confused and frustrated with this process.
BEHAVIORAL DECISION MAKING FOR THE ENTREPRENEUR
A behavior decision maker is all about the interaction of those he works with. He wants everyone to get along and to minimize or avoid conflict. He likes working with groups and is good at getting people to see things his way. This leader desires to reconcile disagreements and make sure everyone is satisfied with the decision.
This style can give the team a sense of ownership because of the consideration given to opinions and relationships within the group. However, too much please the crowd focus can lead to weak and ineffective decision making and leadership.
Our team has the opportunity to contribute a great deal to the decision with this style. They can create a cohesive dynamic when successful. However, if one person feels more heard than another this can backfire on keeping our team cohesive and peaceful. Sincere listening and consideration of ideas by the leader is essential for keeping the team strong with this style.
HEART-CENTERED DECISION MAKING FOR THE ENTREPRENEUR
As Christians, I think there is an additional style of decision making. It’s the heart-centered style. Research aside, we cannot forget or ignore the spiritual aspects of our person and our team when making decisions.
Sometimes we call it a gut feeling, sometimes it’s a vibe. In truth, it’s the spirit of God within you. He is leading you and guiding you through prayer or the feeling you get when you make a certain decision – a feeling of peace or excitement or both, for example.
Prayer is an essential part of heart-centered decision making. We are spirit, soul and body, after all. To ignore the spiritual part of our being regarding decision making in our life and business is to ignore God within us.
The heart-centered decision maker prays about everything, incorporating one of the above styles within that prayer. She listens carefully for answers to her prayers and acts on the direction God is leading. This leader is confident that, no matter the decision, when made with the right heart, God will direct her steps.
The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. Proverbs 16:9
While some may not understand this way of decision making, usually the results which yield from heart-centered decisions are best for all parties involved in both short-term and long-term success.
As for our team, heart-centered decision making, because it centers around prayer, can prove to be very helpful. Asking team members to pray for an answer to the same decision we are contemplating can bring you confirmation. It might even bring correction through the answers our team may receive. Praying together with our team also builds relationship. Not to mention the exponential power when two or more agree in prayer!
All in One Accord
Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. Matthew 18:19
God Bless Our Decision Making as Entrepreneurs
May the Lord bless us and keep us and help us make wise decisions in our businesses;
may the Lord make His face to shine upon us and be gracious to us;
may the Lord lift up His countenance upon us and give us peace!
(Adapted from Numbers 6:24-26)
What style of decision maker are you most of the time?
How do you incorporate heart-centered decision making in your business and with your team?
About Karen Lindwall-Bourg
Karen Lindwall-Bourg is the President of the {Inter} National Association of Christian Women Entrepreneurs [est. May 2010] and the new President of the International Christian Mompreneur Network [est. July 2010], both at http://nacwe.org . She and the NACWE Operations and Leadership Teams work diligently to provide
· Community
· Networking
· Education
· Missions
opportunities to Christian Women Entrepreneurs, Mompreneurs and Nanapreneurs alike all over the world!
Our Core Values are
· Community – we value Connection, Collaboration and Contribution
· Networking – we value Nurture, New relationships and New and innovative offers
· Education – we value Encouragement, Excellence and Expressiveness, and
· Missions – we value Ministry and Making a difference
Karen is wife to Fred, Mommy to 6 kids and 5 in-loves, Nana to “going-on” 12 grandchildren, and treat provider deluxe for a herd of Great Pyrenees who protect their north TX ranch! She is an entrepreneur coach, author, publisher, retreat hostess and more! Learn more about Mastermind groups and “Celebration” coaching with Karen at http://karenbourg.com .
To think we go through our day, every day, making decision after decision without really thinking about how we do it. At least until something challenging pops up – then we wring our hands and constantly repeat, “I just don’t know what to do.”
Even in those moments, we naturally seek out the opinions and advice of people we love and trust. But still, we hesitate, worry, and procrastinate – putting off the puzzling choice. We fear it will be the wrong choice. We fear the consequences of our perplexing decision. We worry about people getting hurt.
But, there is hope!
THE STUDY OF MAKING WISE DECISIONS
People actually study the process of decision making! They develop models for making decisions with algorithms, equations, and even games of chance (flipping a coin). However, most studies agree on the 6 C’s of decision making: construct, compile, collect, compare, consider, and commit. Yet, few take into consideration our access to the God of All.
Learn to make some big decisions using the 6 C’s plus a 7th C = Christ!
THE 7 C’S OF MAKING WISE DECISIONS
The plans of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord. All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirit. Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established. The Lord has made everything for its purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble. Proverbs 16:1-4
Construct – Think of this as drawing a map. You want to know exactly what needs to be decided. Are you deciding to move or drive to a job site two hours from home? Be crystal clear about the choice you need to make.
Compile – Make a list of the requirements which must be met. For example, salary, time with family, job satisfaction. The list will include both facts and figures (quantifiable) but also attitudes and opinions (unquantifiable) of all interested parties.
Collect– Collect information on alternatives to the decision you are facing. Consider options you have not explored that are relevant to the situation AND that meet the requirements from your compiled list. In the case of the job, you could consider turning it down, living away from home and renting during the week, waiting for the school year to be over before moving, etc.
Compare – Compare the alternatives to the major choice. Consider what makes one better than another. Examine each choice from all angles.
Consider – Think about all the possible positive and negative consequences of each choice. Ask what could go right or wrong for every idea on the table.
Commit– Make a decision and go for it.
As Christians, we have an advantage in decision making. That advantage comes in the form of prayer, communication and counsel. Let’s change up a couple of these to take into account our Sovereign Lord.
THE 7TH C OF MAKING WISE DECISIONS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT STEP
Use all your worldly and spiritual resources to make decisions; God gave us a brain and free will for a reason. But remember this and find peace in it:
The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. Proverbs 16:9
Consult with Christ!
Consider with Prayer – Of course you could spend a lot of your time and even get stuck in the consideration stage wondering what could go wrong – or you can pray. After all, we are to be anxious for nothing but with prayer and supplication make our requests known to God. You don’t have to continuously struggle with what-could-go-wrong You will get the answers you seek when you pray.
Communicate – Consider seeking wise counsel as instructed by the Word of God. We are to communicate with those people in our lives that care the most for us. Can you image making a major decision without discussing it with your spouse? This whole process should be undertaken with your significant other. Each of you will have a unique perspective on every one of the C’s of decision making. Additionally praying about it, together and individually, will lead to unity in the decision. God will speak to you both. It’s just good sense!
Whoever gives thought to the word will discover good, and blessed is he who trusts in the Lord. The wise of heart is called discerning, and sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness. Good sense is a fountain of life to him who has it, but the instruction of fools is folly. Proverbs 16:20-22
Counsel – Seeking the counsel of your spouse is not the only wisdom you should pursue. Sage counsel and wisdom involves being fully informed. It’s also sometimes prudent to talk to a pastor or a professional counselor. Get wisdom.
How much better to get wisdom than gold! To get understanding is to be chosen rather than silver. Proverbs 16:16
Control– Give it up! God asks us to seek Him. He tells us when we ask we will get an answer, when we seek we will find, and when we knock the door will be opened. Bottom line – God won’t leave you dangling.
GOD IS MAKING WISE DECISIONS
So in all of these steps of making a decision realize this: every decision is from the Lord! (Proverbs 16:33)
God Bless Our Decision Making
May the Lord bless us and keep us and help us make wise decisions;
may the Lord make His face to shine upon us and be gracious to us;
may the Lord lift up His countenance upon us and give us peace!
(Adapted from Numbers 6:24-26)
Can you think of another precept that begins with “C” to help when making wise decisions?
The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord.
Proverbs 16:33
Everyday Decision Making
Every day we are faced with numerous decisions. We choose what to wear to work and what to eat for lunch. Bigger decisions include who to marry or which car to buy. Every choice we make begins with a thought process that helps us finalize a decision. Sometimes it’s as simple as the notion we are craving steak. Other times our decisions are a result of the influence of others. No matter how we come to the decision, there are some skills we can work with to help us make the best decision possible. But first, we must commit to making decisions that please the Lord!
USING REASON IN DECISION MAKING
…that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.
2 Timothy 3:17
Using reason and intelligent judgment during decision making is a skill we can strengthen. With reason, we make a decision based on the facts. Improving our reasoning skills involves collecting all the facts relevant to a decision.
In the case of choosing what to eat for lunch, reason considers the facts. Those facts include calorie content, nutritional content, time to prepare and eat, our nutritional needs, our health needs, and so on.
USING INTUITION IN DECISION MAKING
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Everyone experiences that “gut feeling”. It’s the sensation we get in our stomach or our gut that tells us to lean in one direction or another when faced with a choice to make. Lots of people talk about that “warning” gut feeling in circumstances which are dangerous. However, we fine-tune our gut feeling by listening to it.
As a Christian our gut feeling is often the Spirit of God inside of us, guiding us to the best choices. Trusting in the Lord to guide our steps is of primary importance. It takes practice and discipline to learn how to hear and obey God’s voice.
Using a combination of reason and intuition is one of the best ways to make well thought out decisions.
FILTERING INFORMATION IN DECISION MAKING
An intelligent heart acquires knowledge, and the ear of the wise seeks knowledge.
Proverbs 18:15
We live in the information age. It is so easy to access all kinds of reviews about any product we wish to buy. We find both good and bad information. Learning to filter the information is important.
Wisdom finds and processes information. Information is part of the facts we’ll use for reason in our decision making. However, too much information can be overwhelming and cloud our best choices. Research is helpful, but we have to know when to stop looking for more information and start making decisions.
On the other hand, too little information can be as detrimental as too much. We must look into big decisions and get some background for all possible choices.
HEEDING SIGNIFICANT VOICES IN DECISION MAKING
Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.
Proverbs 11:14
Too many cooks spoil the pot. It’s the same with the decision making – too many voices impact decision making to the point that we can’t tell our voice from another’s. So, how do we determine which counselors to listen to?
We must take caution with whom we let speak into our life, especially during times of tough decisions. The people who should give us counsel are the ones who are wise and active in our lives in good times and bad. The input should come from trusted advisors, not just anyone offering an opinion. While we appreciate the opinion of Great Aunt Matilda on our visits every two years, she’s likely not the counselor spoken of in this verse.
This “abundance of counselors” doesn’t mean asking for every one of our friends opinions on a pending decision. It is not about the number of yeses or no’s we get. It is the quality of the counsel that matters most.
It is important to pray about the counselors in our life. God will honor our request and put the right people in our path.
And of course,
GOD IS THE ULTIMATE COUNSELOR FOR DECISION MAKING
A CAUTION ABOUT EMOTIONAL INFLUENCE IN DECISION MAKING
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.
Proverbs 12:15
We all know the truth of this verse when it comes to making a decision when emotional. Think about it for a second, how much is our choice in what we eat for lunch based on the stress of our morning? We all do it. We all make decisions when we are emotional.
The key is balance. Decisions can’t be strictly emotional nor are they strictly analytical. Recognizing our increased emotions about a particular decision will help put things in perspective. It may cause us to act faster or slower. It may keep us from saying something we shouldn’t or prompt us to say something we should.
Emotions are God-given. They are not bad. It is what we do with how we feel that makes them helpful or hurtful. Even an emotion like anger can be turned into positive action that leads to a good decision. When faced with a decision that evokes a lot of emotion it’s important to take care of ourselves.
SELF-CARE BEFORE DECISION MAKING
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”
Psalm 91:1-2
When we dwell in a shelter that is a refuge and a fortress, we can rest. The soldier doesn’t enter a refuge and keep fighting. He rests. He renews his strength. He takes care of himself. He becomes refreshed so he can keep up the good fight.
Self-care isn’t selfish. It includes the time we need to hear what God is saying. It comprises time to rest. It incorporates time to pray and listen. It involves time for refreshing. Take time for a little retreat before making a big decision. Our retreat can be an afternoon off sitting in the sun, a getaway with our trusted counselor or friend or spouse. Sometimes we need to get away for an “official retreat”. I’m on one right now – praying and writing and creating in the Hill Country of Texas!
Taking a step back before a big choice helps us build our decision making skills. It helps us filter out unnecessary information, helps determine what encompasses wise counsel, and gives us time to settle our emotions. When all these things are in place it is easier to apply reasoning and intuition in effectively deciding what is best for us
God Bless Our Decision Making
May the Lord bless us and keep us and help us make wise decisions;
may the Lord make His face to shine upon us and be gracious to us;
may the Lord lift up His countenance upon us and give us peace!
(Adapted from Numbers 6:24-26)
Please share where you go in the Scriptures when needing to make wise decisions.
Karen Lindwall-Bourg is the President of the {Inter} National Association of Christian Women Entrepreneurs [est. May 2010] and the new President of the International Christian Mompreneur Network [est. July 2010], both at http://nacwe.org . She and the NACWE Operations and Leadership Teams work diligently to provide
· Community
· Networking
· Education
· Missions
opportunities to Christian Women Entrepreneurs, Mompreneurs and Nanapreneurs alike all over the world!
Our Core Values are
· Community – we value Connection, Collaboration and Contribution
· Networking – we value Nurture, New relationships and New and innovative offers
· Education – we value Encouragement, Excellence and Expressiveness, and
· Missions – we value Ministry and Making a difference
Karen is wife to Fred, Mommy to 6 kids and 5 in-loves, Nana to “going-on” 12 grandchildren, and treat provider deluxe for a herd of Great Pyrenees who protect their north TX ranch! She is an entrepreneur coach, author, publisher, retreat hostess and more! Learn more about Mastermind groups and “Celebration” coaching with Karen at http://karenbourg.com .
Start the year with deeper intimacy with God by learning how to let your heart be known by God. Four steps to go deep with God this new year.
Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts!And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting! Psalms 139:23-24
God sees you and knows you.
The majority of Psalm 139 is about how intimately God knows you. He knows the number of hairs on your head. The Creator of the universe knows where you stand up and when you sit down. His hand goes before you and He follows behind you. He knows when you’re awake and He knows when you try to hide from Him. His thoughts for you outnumber the grains of sand.
I don’t know if you’ve ever held a handful of sand and considered how many grains you held, but the Lord’s thoughts for you are even more numerous than that! This psalm doesn’t portray a stalker or “I’m-watching-to-punish-you-for-being-bad” kind of note to you. It is a love letter from an attentive lover who is watching over you and considering you in every way.
The truth about God knowing your heart.
Let’s look again at the last two verses of Psalm 139:
Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting! Psalm 139: 23-24 (ESV)
A friend of mine would read these verses and interpret them as if she’s failed to live up to holiness and righteousness. This could not be further from the truth!
These words are a normal response for anyone who has just realized how deeply loved they are. Have you not asked your spouse how you can improve yourself in order to improve your marriage? Have you ever had conversations with your best friend about annoying or hurtful behavior that you could change? These are the things we do when we realize someone loves us so much. We don’t want to offend them or cause them grief.
At the end of this psalm we ask the Lord to “know us more.” The psalmist writes—pleads—for the Lord to reveal to him the things in his own heart that are offensive. It is an invitation to be known. It’s an invitation for the Holy Spirit to point out the things which need to be changed. It is a surrender to the love of God, from a Holy God who wants to see you different than you are—not because you are bad, not because you are not enough—but because you (as are we all) are broken and the Lord can heal us.
Going deeper in your intimacy with God.
Meditate on verses 1-22 of Psalm 139. Marvel in the specific, persistent and continual love God has for you.
Pray and ask the lord, “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts.”
Listen as He answers your prayer, and don’t be discouraged by His answers. It is a continuation of His love and devotion to you.
Follow the instruction of the Lord as He guides you and leads you into victory over offending thoughts and ways.
At the start of this year, meditate on the love, intimacy, and devotion expressed in Psalm 139:1-22. Prayerfully consider and ask the Lord to show you what needs to change. However, do not take this on in your own strength. The Lord will show you…let Him lead you in the way everlasting.
Karen Lindwall-Bourg is the President of the {Inter} National Association of Christian Women Entrepreneurs [est. May 2010] and the new President of the International Christian Mompreneur Network [est. July 2010], both at http://nacwe.org . She and the NACWE Operations and Leadership Teams work diligently to provide
· Community
· Networking
· Education
· Missions
opportunities to Christian Women Entrepreneurs, Mompreneurs and Nanapreneurs alike all over the world!
Our Core Values are
· Community – we value Connection, Collaboration and Contribution
· Networking – we value Nurture, New relationships and New and innovative offers
· Education – we value Encouragement, Excellence and Expressiveness, and
· Missions – we value Ministry and Making a difference
Karen is wife to Fred, Mommy to 6 kids and 5 in-loves, Nana to “going-on” 12 grandchildren, and treat provider deluxe for a herd of Great Pyrenees who protect their north TX ranch! She is an entrepreneur coach, author, publisher, retreat hostess and more! Learn more about Mastermind groups and “Celebration” coaching with Karen at http://karenbourg.com
